YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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