Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Randomize