this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
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