can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
