The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
