I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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