He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
