...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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