We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
