You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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