Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
