Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
