i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
he thought i was a dude.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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