I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Alive.
So much puke
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
