Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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