his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
