Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Randomize
