Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
