How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
