Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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