This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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