I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
