You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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