My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
