What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
