remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
