Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
