So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Randomize
