well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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