smell my finger.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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