I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
i came on her dog
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Can I color on your dick again?
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
