Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Randomize
