at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
