if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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