Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
