i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
