I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
