i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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