Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
