lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
