yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
