sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
