just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
