addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
