She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
