i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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