Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
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