just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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