i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
He better not be in your backpack
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
