i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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