it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
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