Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
id be glad to
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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